Where the future looks bright, like those kids who sit in the first bench and pay attention and take notes and all

Notes it seems.

I know I know, writing is an effective method of information retention, and it helps focus the left side of the brain, also known as the medulla goeffurself.

But still.

Naa, actually I dont have anything against note keepers. I think they serve a noble purpose in fact, helping us gaandus when the shit gets real. The most sought-after were the ones who not only made notes, but those who made notes in clear handwriting AND were willing to share them.

That last bit is the most important one. After all, what good is all the food in the world if it is held in the arms of a stone faced bouncer. Those would be some massive fucking arms no? Like that bouncer could bear hug all of china.

I wonder what that would look like. Mashes of people stuck together in this death grip, slowly being crushed into each other. Slowly, because you have to round all of them up, and then you can start your work. Slowly. So that first they try and fight it out, push and tear at each other. But then, they can no longer even do that. And the bodies come closer and closer together, covering noses and ears and mouths. Until the screams can no longer be screamed. The cracking of the bones, of the teeth, the rupture of the veins and arteries.

The sound of a million people dying.

In a bear hug.

I really should re-start work on my children’s book.


There is this one song by Phish that I have just falled in love with.


Matlab wah bhai. Isko bolto hain music. Kya lyrics maara hai bhai.

Matlab wah.


I like the word “matlab” especially if it is used to emphasize something particularly redundant. Then it should be used like this “matlab why?”

Kro, you should really eat healthy and do exercise and all.

Matlab why.


I wonder who came up with this concept of surnames. And middle names. What possible purpose do they serve. Wouldnt it make more sense just to have like 4-5 first names and then just add numbers after them?

“Yo, Joseph 743! Wazzup brah, long time”.

I don’t really think it would get too confusing. Yeah, maybe the numbers would get bigger but then people would keep popping off (in a bear hug?), and so you would more or less have some new numbers coming up. Like they have for mobile numbers.

I don’t know how I would feel about being called a number. I know that that is a technique used in jails and hospitals to de-humanise the convict/patient. To distance the “human” element, and I get that argument. But still yaar.

And middle names toh matlab why. Serve absolutely no purpose whatsoever. I mean just thooso it in the surname if you are so desperate. Why you want to waste ink on this paper and that form and this passport and all? Means why?

“Mary Schumacher Kro. Why you not taking notes?”

“Miss, but why miss? Matlab why?”

“Come here, I will tell you why! Come here now. Hold out your hands. And if you cry, you will get five more!”

dhoom bishoom dhoom.

It would be cool if the teacher tried to fuck around with some kid who had some third degree belt in karate. Fuck, i would buy popcorn and all for that shit.


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