Where the words slowly crawl back, like those little baby turtles on the beaches surrounded by do-gooders


If there was ever a species of people who deserve to be extinct, do gooders would be it.

Imagine if they are killed by the very causes they are trying to protect. Would they become martyrs? “Thats Tom the Orka Protector. Died after unpleasantly surprising Free Dilly” From now one, he will be called Torka.

T-shirts bearing Torka, worn by hitch hikers, and hung on the walls of backpacking hostels all over the world. The entire universe of twitter bursting with #Torka all over the place. #IswimWithTorka trending on whichever “social” platform you “choose” to be on.

The illusion of free choice could not be made more illusory than in the current scheme of things.


I can understand why people went all gaga over Hema Malini. Those big brown eyes being all mischievous as shit, drawing you in. Skating all over the place, badminton racket in hand.

She must have been quite the bomb back then. Dream girl for shizzle.


So Asin is getting married. To the guy who builds phones. Cant compete with that. Just cant.

In fact, there are a lot of things I cant compete with. Orkas for instance. For sure. I would never want to get into a swimming competition with Orkas. That would be a fucking disaster.

I wonder if orkas trash talk. Like serious trash talk.

“Yo mama so ugly, she froze Free’s willy”


I should grow up. Up up and away!


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