One sentence movie review – Haider

Whenever someone tells me they loved it, all I can think is, “Kya yeda hai kya?”


Dude dude dude.

Called someone’s girlfriend a man. Like we was looking at photos, and I was like “Is this your bro” and he was like, “dude thats my girlfriend” and I was like fkfkfkkfkfkf.

Goddam faint moustaches.

You know, those faintly hairy upper lips. All glistening and shit.



But the worst ones are the babies whose gender are impossible to ascertain. Fuckers be dancing and jumping and wearing unisex clothes, and you be like, “So what’s her name” and you get this super passive aggressive response, “His name is Raja”.


Bastard unisex looking kids.

I love the word “bastard” mainly for its versatility. It just about goes anywhere you know. Look at that bastard pigeon OR Aye bastard popcorn you so yummy OR Bastard man bastard man.

Oooo that reminded me of this awesome superhero – SafeSex Man. I don’t know if this is an idea I have had before but I was just thinking SS Man would be super duper awesome.

Wearing this condom over his head, going around preaching the virtues of rubber. Fighting the evil goons of Agent Going Raw.

Safesex man Safesex man, fighting bulging population like no one else can.

Is that a zeppelin? No, no. Its SAFE SEX MAN!




This is like my third cup of coffee. The filtered kind. Fucking have so many super marios bouncing around in my head that it aint funny. It aint funny y’all. It aint funny at all.

Like inside my brain there is this double amputee going around trying to smack mosquitoes. Failing miserably.




Hema Malini, mein aa rahoo hoooooooooooooooo

This entry was posted in complete and utter bullshit and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s