Where I realise that if I could be any other animal, it would be a toss up between a krow and a baby goat

Krow, for obvious reasons.

Baby goat (yeah I know what they are called) cause there is just so much potential there.

Have you ever seen a baby goat. Jumping around, always wondering who or what it can headbutt. In the bum.

I could be like that on some days. Slyly hanging around the corner, pretending to chew some grass. All the while thinking who should I headbutt, who should I headbutt.

.

So brought myself a couple of chicken kathi rolls before boarding the flight (am sick of Indigo food) and was nicely imagining myself bite into them on the way to the seat. And then I sit down, and arrange myself in a dainty, composed manner (read step over 2 pairs of shoes, nearly fart in someone’s face, and then sit down right on that seatbelt buckle thing).

And then I plonk myself down, and am just about to open the box of kathi rolls. When the air hostess lands up, “Sir are you willing to lay down your life for the betterment of society? Are you open to sacrificing your life for the people around you? Do you, yes you, possess the presence of mind to open a door? Do you? Do you?”

Bitch.

And full with nice smile and all, she launches into that emergency window landing speech. And in my head I am like “Kathi kathi kathi kathi”. So I perfect the dumb nod and fake smile and wait till she leaves.

And then just stuff my face. Man, you should have seen the look on my co-passenger’s face. I think she was vegetarian.

Fuck.

….

While de-boarding, I was walking behind this super chubby baby and making all full strange  faces at the kid. And the air hostess says, “Bye bye cutie” and for one second (just one second), I thought she was talking to me.

Chubby kid, you bastard.

..

We cannot be frightened to open our eyes anymore. We cannot let those who lead to show us the truth. We must open our hands and open our minds. For only then will we learn to walk on the path of life. The path of life is hypnotic go to sleep. You are being hypnotised now go to sleep. Toodles and dreams of slapping crows and biting cows. Toodles go to sleep, go to sleep.

If I could, I would do the chamak challo at every conceivable occasion.

“Sir, your burger is ready” – do the chammak challo

“Kro, your sister is a retard” – do the chammak challo

“So you accept our Terms of Service?” – Do the chammak challo

“He was a loving husband, and a caring father. May his soul rest in peace” – Do the chammak challo

I really do think that people forget about their bodies after a while. Like just forget. Don’t let that happen to you. Do the break dance at the bus stop, wave your hands like a crazy fool while in the elevator, run your hands over your face and do the tango like you the last person on the planet.

And to put you in the mood:

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