Where I reveal two of the most perverted words in the history of the english language and other things

Ready?

Trust me, you will be shocked at the truth.

Like the end of an X-files episode.

Without wasting any more time, I give to you the two dirty words.

And they are.

“It seems”.

Are you shocked? Are ya? r ya r ya?

Its true.

Add the above two words to ANY sentence and you will inevitably make even the most plain-sounding sentences to be loaded to the gills with innuendo.

Sample: “So you just visited Delhi, it seems?”

or

“Just went to the bathroom, it seems?”

Try it out. Trust me.

Oh god, my genius astounds even me some times.

……………………………………………………….

Things I Hate About Women #67851:

The way they always know when you are checking out their bum. It does not matter how discreet you think you are being, BOOM, suddenly they will turn around at the most precise of moments, look you in the eye and BOOM you have just been caught!

I just don’t know how they do it.

Like the other day, a perky little bum and me had just completed dinner and we we were walking down the stairs and she is in front of me and I am admiring the view when BOOM she turns around, looks me straight in the eye and gives me THE “I know what you were doing right now” look, smiles all superiorly and walks away.

WHAT THE FUCK MAN. THEY GOT EYES AT THE BACK OF THEIR BUMS!!!!!

………………………………

Something made me think of super heroes and I was thinking about super women and then I was thinking of eye lashes and that made me think of the breeze which an eye-lash makes when you blink.

And I was just thinking if a gazillion people faced the same direction and blinked at the exact same time then there may be a hurricane or at least a really strong breeze.

And then (since movement and time, as concepts, fascinate me) I was thinking of the little, little fly which is affected by the gust of “wind” created by the fluttering of the eyelids. Which also made me think of those microscopic worm-thingies which float over your eye and you sometimes get a glimpse of them when you stare into the light.

And how they must be wiggling around in some sort of liquid and that made me think of movement per se and so I was thinking how difficult it is to move in water and whether something else would find it difficult to move in air.

And that made me think of flight and how simply awesome that is and how it would feel to glide through the skies with nothing but the clouds and the sun to keep you company.

And that made me think of the time I went para-sailing and how frikkin saxy it was and how you literally feel like you can fly off to any corner of the world. Like proper fly and not glide or parachute or attach your stomach to a jeep and be towed or whatever.

……………………………

Oh and I started using Flickr with this account. Not quite sure how to integrate it with the blog though.

WordPress and images do not seem to gel too well. Or at least, that is my initial impression.

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