Where I think twice

I have this idea in my head. Actually quite a lot of them. Actually its a bit like a virar-churhgate at 9am on a monday. At times.

Just not sure whether its going to work out or not or how its gonna happen or what its going to look like.

I suppose those ideas are like people at the very edge of a cliff. An inventor about to try his new flying machine. Peering down the cliff and wondering whether the fevicol is going to hold or not.


Fuck. That is so not positive thinking.

Fevicol. I love fevicol. Especially when you use too much of it on purpose so that it gets stuck to your fingers and then you wait for it to dry and then peel it off as if it is a second skin or something.

The smell of fevicol shall forever remind me of school projects and arts class. I was terrible at both. My “drawings” were almost always fighter planes with a hundred guns (the more the guns the better the drawing). And each gun would have this super-awesome power. And of course the plane had to be “x-proof” where “x” can be fire or rain or bullets or bombs or even God.

So it would be either planes with a million guns or a house with a tree which a lot of people mistook for a face (don’t as me how). As an artist I did find that rather discouraging. 

I’m wondering if you are allowed to have a full stop between two brackets. Or are the brackets like those obnoxious bouncers at snotty clubs. “No full stop. What’s the password?” And the full stop stammers and stutters and says “Comma” and then he is politely told to eff off.

I think all super powers should only work if you are to say them out aloud first. Like before you zap the bad guys you have to say “The Zap of Ghooman!” or whatever. That just makes the super power thing a whole lot awesomer. The more basic ones are of course “Karate chop” brilliantly displayed in the austin power series. So before you knock the baddie out you should say “Kung fu kick” or “Ninjutsu nut-cracker” or whatever.

Ideally you should say it and do it at the same time.

Its unfair that air guitar gets all the attention while air-kung fu gets totally neglected. Its an art you know, a proper frikkin art.

I practice air-kung fu a lot. Ten minutes of air kung fu and you are set for the day. It helps if you can imitate the Bruce Lee noises but you are free to come up with your own ninja noises of course.

One thing you must perfect is that vigorous shaking thing. Like you punch the baddie and then you just hold the pose with such intensity that your fist trembles. 

Kheee yaaaaa.

And the best thing about air-kung fu is that you can totally kick like a million baddies bums all over the place. Combine all the different martial arts and come up with some moves of your own.

And you can even practice meditation and shit.

Air Kung fu is awesome.




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