Cheap Urban Thrill No. 28530

Wait for the signal to turn red.

When it does, quickly walk onto the zebra crossing and raise your hands towards the slowing traffic. Look authoritative.

And as the cars and scooters stop right in front of you, give them all one, final look of approval.

And walk away.

Cheap Urban Thrill No.97430 (for males only)

Walk into that stinky public loo. Head for the urinal.

Pee.

While peeing, try to aim high. Literally, see how high you an go.

Alternative version:

Try to pee onto the paan stains.

Extra points if you manage to wash the stains away.

——————–

Kids go to school in the morning. All bundled up, with their parent/s standing with them at the bus stop.

Some of them have that look I have often seen in the eyes of goats. As they are slowly led towards the slaughterhouse.

——————————–

I read another Saki the other night. Goddamit man. Now that is someone who has my respect. Reeeeeespect.

Someone suggested I read that Harukami chap. Sorry. The name intimidates me. Much like that other chap, what’s his name, Kundera?

So does Palmuik or whoever wrote My Name Red Is or whatever.

I am decidedly old fashioned in more ways than one and it shows most perceptibly in my taste in books. Other than good ole Chuck, there isn’t really any “un conventional” chap I can think of.

Lets see, there is…………….nope. Can’t think of anything.

Any recommendations? Do let me know.

“Do let me know”. Another one of those sentences which, 99% of the time, are said without any sincerity whatsoever.

That and “I will get back to you on this one”. The person who says that is actually desperate to say “Fuck off”.

Oh and “please revert”. Revert?? What the fuck does that mean.

Revert.

Sounds like a river farting. Or a reverse vomit. Or a verb which did LSD.

Fuck. Words on drugs.

Now there is an idea.

——————————————–

Meet me for dinner

Meet me in the shadows

Meet my eyes and share my sadness

Meet me for lunch.

Wrote the hungry poet, desperately craving a quarter-pounder in between a toasted, sesame bun with mustard, pickle, onion, lettuce, bacon bits and melted cheese.

Served with curly fries.

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6 Responses to Cheap Urban Thrill No. 28530

  1. Anand says:

    You mean a Royale with Cheese.

  2. Anand says:

    “Revert” means “return to original state”, by the way, and it’s a verb.

  3. Cheap Urban Thrill No. 28530 – check.

  4. Eveline says:

    Cheap Urban Thrill No. 28530 – On Saturday afternoon on M.G Fur-eeking Road! :))

    And Milan Kundera is brilliant!!! His new book of essays is enough to send me to the bookshop within the next hour. But I’m trying to fight being broke.
    Try ‘The Book of Laughter and Forgetting’.

    • kroswami says:

      @Anand I: royale dont have bacon bits. Also “Le Big Mac” bwahahahahahaha. cult moment.

      @Anand II: right. thanks.

      @Relativity: *nod of approval*

      @Ms. Eveline: Hmmm MG Road eh? perfect.
      think i will skip kundera for the moment…perhaps when the reading taste has developed a bit

  5. :P says:

    Please revert back is even better.

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