So sonofabitch decided to lend me his cooler. For free and for as long as I would like. Which was spectacularly nice of him, I must admit.
Coolers, for those who are not in the know, are the poor-man’s AC and by “poor” I of course don’t mean the (uggh) aam aadmi with their sweaty, stinky clothes and proclivity towards procreation.
A cooler works by essentially sucking in air, treating it with water and then exhaling the cold, water laced air out. If the room ain’t too big, then it can be quite effective and while you are not guaranteed a/c like chills, it definitely makes the heat bearable.
So anyway, last night I fill the cooler with water (took me 10 trips to and fro from the loo to the cooler, with a 1.5L bottle in the hand). Turned it on, got a mild shock coz it was not earthed properly or whatever. And then the fans whirled and I knew that the night would be peaceful for once.
And then I woke up at around four in the morning with hot air being blasted all over my bum and lower regions (I sometimes sleep like that). Fucking thing DID NOT WORK!!! worse, what it was doing was sucking in the abundant hot air, doing FRIKKING NOTHING and then spitting out a little bit more of the hot air.
Plus I awoke to the fact that I had left the door open and it was ajar and the dustbin was sprawled over the floor and then when I tried picking up the mess I found out that the ants had decided to attack the old bread piece that was there.
Those fuckin ants attacked me roti a few nights ago. Ken ya frikkin believe that. Those whores.
Speaking of which, visited Scoobs new place in “south” delhi. The man has become a proper south dilli wallah. Office near JNU with a flat in vasant kunj. He got a real sweet deal he did. 1 room set, top floor, DDA flat with an A/c and a cooler and considerable amount of privacy. And a loo and a basin with a mirror. And a kitchen with shelves and shit. Lucky bastard.
So anyway, over pepperoni and pepsi, Scoobs was showing off the place. And telling me of the view and the a/c and the cooler and all that.
Mentioned the fact that he could see the Qutub Minar in the morning.
To which I replied “So can I, if you know what I mean *wink*”
My sense of humour is brilliant. Like fuckin brilliant. Like so fuckin mind blowing it is brilliant. Like its not funny how funny I am.
I love women. Really I do. If only they were not so stick-up-their-ass-ee all the time, it would be great.
Ever notice how, when people say “oh you must be there when I visit! Book your tickets na” they never, ever frikkin ever offer to pay for the ticket?